Submission scriptures are difficult to accept. I must admit that I have trouble with the “submission scriptures”. There were times when I skip over these scriptures thinking that if I do not read them, they do not exist. Now is the time to face the submission scriptures squarely and try to understand what these scriptures are trying to teach us. Are theses scriptures prejudiced against women?
Jesus spoke with and taught women. He forgave women. He appreciated the kindness women gave to Him. Jesus had friends that were women. Jesus valued the woman caught in adultery and exposed the hypocrisy of the men who wanted to stone her. Jesus spoke to the woman at the well-He valued that women and all who came to Him through her testimony.
Christians are deeply divided on this issue
There seems to be conflicts in translation of the submission scriptures. For example, is the woman to always obey her husband? Is there a line for big and little issues? Is the women always supposed to be the one who compromises even in physical and verbal abuse? Can she chose the color or the new car or does she give into whatever her husband wants?
In the book, “Ten Lies the Church Tells Women” , there is a word huotasso means to “identify with” or “be attached to” or could mean “become one with”. This word meaning does not mean “obey as a child obeys parents. Page 179 Some translations will state “obey”. Certainly, every translation is slightly different and different translations also adds to confusion.
In addition, the meaning of Greek words get fought over and most translations state that they are most accurate. The book referenced below are a help to clarify the women’s submission scriptures.
Wife Duties-Submission Scriptures
“like wise you wives, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not observe you chaste conduct accompanied by fear.”
Wives, fit in with your husband’s plans; for then if they refuse to listen when you talk to them about the Lord, they will be won by your respectful, pure behavior. Your godly lives will speak to them better any words.
Husband’s duties-Submission Scriptures
You husbands must be careful of your wives, being thoughtful of their needs and honoring them as the weaker sex. Remember that you and your wife are partners in receiving God’s blessings, and if you don’t treat her as you should, you prayers will not get ready answers.
And you husbands, show the same kind of love to your wives as Christ showed to the church when He died for her, to make her holy and clean, wash by baptism and God’s Word: So that he could give her to Himself as a glorious church without a single spot or wrinkle or any other blemish, being holy and without a single fault. That is how husbands should treat their wives, loving them as parts of themselves. For since a man and wife are one, a man is really doing himself a favor loving himself when he loves his wife.
Honor Christ by submitting to each other. You wives must submit to your husband’s leadership in the same way you submit to the lord. For a husband is in charge of his wife in the same way Christ is in charge of His body, the church. (He gave His very life to take care of it and be it’s Savior!)
Single Women-Pray Often and Think Hard Before You Marry
Here I want to add some suggestion of my own. These are not direct commands from the Lord, but they seem right to me.
And if a Christian woman has a husband who isn’t a Christian, and he wants her to stay with him, she must not leave him. For perhaps the husband who isn’t a Christian may become a Christian with the help of his Christian wife.
But if the husband or wife who isn’t a Christian is eager to leave, it is permitted. In such cases the Christian husband or wife should not insist that the other stay, for God wants His children to live in peace and harmony. For, after all, there is no assurance to you wives that your husband will be converted if they stay, and the same may be said to you husbands concerning your wives.
Single Christian Women
It is the same with a girl who marries. She faces the same problem. A gird who is not married is not anxious to please the Lord in all she is and does. But a married woman must consider other things such as housekeeping and the likes and dislike of her husband.
I am saying this to help you, not to try to keep you from marrying. I want you to do whatever will help you serve the Lord best, with as few other things as possible to distract your attention from Him.
The wife is part of her husband as long as he lives, if her husband dies then she may marry again, but only if she marries a Christian. Be in my opinion she will be happier if she doesn’t marry again; and I think I am giving you counsel from God’s Spirit when I say this. 1 Cor 34-25 & 39-40
Personal Note from Connie to single Christian Women
You, Christian woman, are in a difficult place in your life if you are looking for a husband. There is a severe man shortage in the Christian church. That could leave some women without a husband.
Look, honestly speaking, I was a just baby born-again Christian when I was a young single women. I dated both Christian and non-Christian men. Actually, the Christian men were not honoring my Christianity or womanhood. They talked about a lop-sided submission and wanted to have sex on the first date or sooner. Non-Christian men treated me better. They did not talk submission and had a sense of humor that made me laugh and gave a lightness in our relationship.
I a married a non-Christian man and that was taking a risk. Ok, I admit that we had extreme chemistry. BUT I did take into consideration how he treated me in our relationship and in front of his family. We were married for many years until he passed away. He became a Christian later in our married life. I am not sorry I married him. To marry a good Christian man is ideal. As a result of a man shortage in the Christian church, you might need to date men who are not Christian or not be married.
Just think hard and ask yourself- Is he really the man I want to be one with for the rest of my life? Will this man honor you and keep you safe physically and financially? (Does he have a job?) Does he honor you in front of his friends and family?
Be careful single Christian woman-the quality of the rest of your life depends on your decision on who you marry.
Why is submission such a hot issue?
After reading these passages carefully, I still have more questions than answers. In any relationship, there must be a leader. Most noteworthy, I do not believe that Jesus expects a woman whose husband emotionally or physically abuses her to stay in a marriage.
In conclusion, a leader is a servant. Jesus is our example-He is our leader. He is our servant to the point of torture and death on a cross. That is the example husbands need to follow in order to have a wife submit to him. Yes, women should serve their husband out of love and husbands should serve their wives as Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her. If Christians keep the example of leadership of Jesus Christ, then there should be no deeply complicated issue.